Putting a price tag on the memories

Today we finalized putting our house on the market.

It is not a fancy home by any standards, but it has been home for us while we have lived in Abilene. It has been the first home we ever owned and each room is full of memories.

The Realtor sat down with us yesterday. Today we finished the start of the process. There is just too much paperwork for anything good to happen in a reasonable time. There are questions I was asked about this house that really seem beyond the pale.

"Has anyone died in this house beyond natural causes and suicide. . ." Now, really, this house is forty+ years old. I can account for only 15 years and what difference does it make? Are we inventorying ghosts? Is the house worth more if someone was murdered here? What if there is a blood stain under the carpet? What if in a previous life this house was a Mafia safe house? If it will help sell the house or add to the value, I could make up something. I have tried to list everything wrong with the structure, but a good yarn that increased the value. . .

I know that not enough birds have died here. I know the family dog has ingested one every now and then. When I quizzed her on how she came to possess such a feast, she has remained mute--kind of like a dog which she plays the part of very well.

I know that few squirrels have perished on these premises, although the family dog has done her best to add that to her menu of offerings. She has done the same with a premise mouse that lives in a tree toward the back of the lot.

I know that I thought I was going to die a couple of times over the years but it was just kidney stones, dehydration, and then the trauma center bill. Beyond that, only the grass, assorted plants and other efforts at outdoor gardening have bit the dust. All the weeds have survived with a zeal that is envious.

So, lets get on with the sale. Although, now that you mention it, I think some Hollywood star broke down in our drive way.